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Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Results of my me day.

So, when I asked if I could have a 'me' day, Daddy said yes. I was immediately thrilled. I also immediately had the urge to clean. Go figure right???

So I did the dishes and cleaned the bathroom a bit. I knocked some sense into myself while doing the bathroom and managed to stop myself after that. I think it is funny that when I am told I can take a day off of cleaning and caring for the house I immediately want to clean. I'm weird like that.

So I relaxed. It was nice. I finished some leftovers that I have been wanting to. They were delicious. I took time and made myself happy.

Daddy came home though and I was a bit snippy with him though. I made a snide comment at something he said and ended up in the bedroom alone [with the cat] while he made dinner. I felt bad for how I said what I said, but not for the reasoning behind what I said. I explained that at dinner and he understood.

So, onto other things that happened tonight... With the comment from earlier out of the way and everything going as usual, Daddy started playing his MMORPG, I think that's the acronym. He started playing a game, let's say. We talked for a moment and I asked a question [I genuinely don't remember what it was] but he said that we were forced into living together and that's not how either of us wanted things right now, etc etc. We continued the conversation, then it ended.

I went into the bedroom and started thinking [this can be hazardous, so watch out!]. I went back into the office and asked if we could talk. I know that we were forced into this situation. My mother made this happen. It is something I have come to terms with though, and it seemed like he hadn't. Like he resented me living here with him. So I told him that my mother and I are on better terms [which is the truth] and I would try and go back to her if that's what he wanted.

I think he was shocked. He knows that going back with her is the last thing I want. She tried to physically hurt me the last time I saw her, so he knows that it would take A LOT for me to go back. He said he would never want me to do that and why I would say something like that. I was honest and laid it out that I felt that's what he wanted. That he didn't want me here. That he loved me more when we were further apart. He disputed everything and told me how much he loved me. How in love with me he is. He told me that he loves having me here. He comforted me and built me back up. I feel like we are in such a better place. I feel like I was in a funk without even knowing it before. I feel cleansed.

I am so happy that he loves me. I am so blessed to have him be my Daddy. I am so lucky that not only does he love me, but he is in love with me. I am the luckiest girl in the world.

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Keep in Mind

Please keep in mind that everything I write is my opinion and what works for me. Please don't ever feel like I am trying to force my ways on you, or that I feel your way is wrong. Things are different in every M/s, D/s, T/b relationship. What works for me may not work for you or the next person. It is all I know and therefore all I can write about. Please feel free to comment and let me know how your relationship or opinion differs though. :) Much love!

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