Fantasy - Rape me.

It is Sunday and I was horny all day today. My pussy soaked through my panties. The cotton material was stuck to me and my scent was all I could smell. I tried to keep my mind off of my desire; I started listening to music and dancing. That didn't help though, my moves were too sexual. I finally stopped fighting it and hopped into my bed. I pulled out my little vibe and pushed aside my panties as this fantasy played in my head...

I am washing the kitchen floors. My headphones are blocking out any noise, music blaring into my ears. My hips are swaying to the music, my shorts are more like panties they are so short. I'm only wearing them and a sports bra. I should be alone in the house but I feel strange all of a sudden. I turn around and see him, standing in the doorway, licking his lips. I go to run but slip on the wet floor as I try to get up. A growl of a laugh comes from him. I try to stand up once again as he slowly walks over. As I finally get to my feet he grabs my wrist and tugs me down to the floor again. I start to scream out for help but he twists my arm until I am screaming in pain and he tells me to shut up. I listen and shut my mouth. He rips off my shorts and panties in one quick swipe. He calls me names. Filthy whore, as he dumps the dirty water over my face. I am gasping for breath. He just laughs. He shoves me into the position that he wants and takes me hard. Nasty slut. Your cunt is dripping. Disgusting bitch. I am left like that when he finishes. He walks out of the door, leaving me in a cold heap on the floor.

'Nilla vs. Kinky

I was talking with my friend Platinum the other day. She is vanilla, but is so extremely open to hearing everything I talk about. Which is absolutely fantastic. I love her. I was worried the first time I mentioned rape, thinking that she would throw me out on the highway to get run over by a car going 120 miles per hour. Instead she listened and understood that it is a fantasy and that I don't condone real rape. I don't get why certain people don't get that. But anyway, she is an amazing friend. That is not what this blog is about though.

This blog is about sex. Everyone [well almost everyone] is having it. I don't understand why my kinky preferences are such a big deal. But, that isn't what this blog is about either. This blog is about vanilla sex. I don't understand it. I have it from time to time. I love it. Sometimes I crave it. However, I know I couldn't have it without the kinky things there too. I would find it boring. I have found it boring. My first relationship that included sex was a top/bottom [that is the only proper definition in my opinion] relationship. It included pain. So perhaps it couldn't even go as far as top/bottom but as far as sadist/masochist. [Once again, that is not what this blog is about either...] Then I had sex with a couple of guys before my Daddy. The guys in between were boring in bed. I always wanted more. I wanted pain, I wanted kinky. I know how great it is to take things slow and to not always be kinky, but I could not do it for very long. I get bored after a while. It is like my mind wanders to other things... [What was the homework for English?... Did you see what so-and-so was wearing today?... That was a horrible speech...]

Once again, this is me. I'm sure that if this is true for me, then the opposite must be true for others. I'm not saying that this is how it is, I'm saying this is how it is for me. I'm also not putting down vanilla sex. I love vanilla sex, in moderation. I love it when my Daddy and I are together and it isn't all kinky and naughty, it is something more soft. I feel like I have to qualify that with saying that kinky sex can be soft too, and that hard sex isn't always kinky. Sex is like the rainbow, there is so many different kinds. I am just giving my view on something...

Sunday, September 13th

I did not like waking up on Sunday. I knew in my heart that my Daddy was leaving, as soon as I started to wake up that was in my mind. I felt the tears starting to well up. I left the bed to go to the bathroom, cried for a moment only to compose myself so I could get back into bed. I snuggled back under the covers when my Daddy started to touch. I started to squirm. To be honest, I didn't want his touch because I wanted to go back to sleep because in my mind if I went back to sleep, Sunday would never come and we could stay there... together. That is all I want, I just want to be with him. My squirming was seen to be resistance and to do the play rape that I had been asking for. I didn't mind, as my wet cunt could tell you.

After the rape I curled under the covers. Not sure if I was seeking warmth, or hiding from leaving. It was a hard day for me. The day he leaves always is a hard day. It is even hard writing this. I may or may not be crying [although leaning more towards may]. Although one of my favorite moments was right before we were leaving the hotel room and I was over by the bed clearing my stuff when he came up behind me, pushed my face into the bed and pulled my dress up and started fucking me. His cock is amazing.

We ended up going out to eat and watch the football game. :) I enjoyed myself [despite what the tears may have been saying]. I dropped him off at the airport and cried again. Big surprise. I got through most of my drive home without crying. I was two miles away from my house when I broke down again. I didn't want to be going back to my house, because it hit it home that I wasn't going home to him...

It is still hard that he is not here. However, I am looking forward to the next time that he is here. Which I think will be in November... I miss him like hell...

Rape Me

So, I have talked about my Daddy raping me before. We've only done it once, but it was AMAZING. I loved the fact that he is so strong and I can really fight back. But anyway, I love being raped [consensually]. I don't think I would want to be in a relationship where I wasn't getting raped. Ideally, I would love to be raped once a week. That would be fabulous.

The vulnerability paired with the fighting gets me off every time. The force and strength that another person can have over me... It is hot. I can't even write about it too long without wanting to touch myself. It is one thing that without fail can get me off everytime. WITHOUT FAIL.

I am so glad that my Daddy likes it too. I was soo afraid the first time I told my Daddy that I wanted to be raped. My first real guy who I have written about before [I feel like I should give him a nickname... oh well...] who I experimented with, we did play rape all the time. I brought it up and he was wary, but didn't judge. So that is what I expected from all future guys... sooo not true I have brought it up with two guys after him and before my Daddy, I was not warmly received. I understand why, but still it sucks. It made me think that I was a bad person. Now I realize that I am not a bad person, I am doing this from my own free will. I want it. So yeah... that's all. I love my Daddy.